never been here before

I've been refreshing my mind on adaptive leadership of late, as some significant changes are happening in my job. Three themes are on my heart today, and when something is on my heart I will loos sleep until I write about it. Influence ___ I've been placed in a position of great influence, pretty much by accident (on my part.) But I am aware of the power I now hold and have been prayerfully processing how best to use this in grace, challenge and love. Influence must never been abused, and must always be used selflessly and with wise discretion. There is another term for this kind of influence - most of the terms are nouns. Some call it a "power-broker" (I first heard this when I read the book "Transitioning" by Dan Southland). PBS went so far as to call it "The Merchants of Cool" in one of their best episodes. Some simply may call them influencers or leaders. I call it terrifying. I've spent a fair amount of time in the last six week...

This is my absolutely favorite children's bible. I hadn't read any sort of children's bible since I was a child myself and when I was looking for something different to use in Children’s Church, I knew The Jesus Storybook Bible would be the way to go. It was highly endorsed at seminary, and several friends of mine use it in Children's Ministry at their church. Sally Lloyd-Jones tells the story of God rescuing us over and over throughout this bible in a beautiful and thoughtful way.  I've never liked kids. I've never wanted to have them, never wanted to work with them. I only do so now because it's a small percentage of my job, and thankfully God has made me not hate them in the process. Today I talked to the kids in Children’s Church about how our sin separates us from God. We read the story of Jonah running away from God and how that's just like when we sin - we get further and further away from him. These kids just love this book. They love the p...

Thomas is the first person I've ever hired. I didn't do it by myself - I put together a committee of four people to help write the job description, go through resume submissions and then ultimately interviews and the hiring. We could only afford to hire a part-time youth director, so we knew it would be tough to find the right person. Thomas was that person. As I was on my way to Starbucks Saturday morning (I managed to wake up with sun at 5:30 on my “day off” – though I spent most of the day working on VBS) and I hit the stop light just outside my subdivision and there he was to my right in his little red car… heading the same direction as me. Thomas has always been an early riser, so I wasn’t too surprised to see him out and about. He waved at me, and when we stopped at the next stop light together, he laughed and smirked, undoubtedly hearing my Mumford and Sons music blaring. Early in the morning in Arizona, you relish having your windows down because of the cool weather....

My small group just began the 9-week study "The Gospel-Centered Life" by World Harvest Mission. I've gone through the 36 week version of this study (Gospel Transformation) twice, once as a learner and once as the teacher. I've also taught another small version of it called "Living in Light of the Gospel Story." These are some of my favorite studies, as well as some of the best reformed explanations of the gospel I’ve ever encountered without ignoring one great aspect of the person: the heart. All too often, reformed theology shoots for the head and forgets that we are holistic people. These studies balance both in a great way.  There were some tears during the first lesson, as one group member was recounting a painful experience she had in the church many years ago that has since stunted her growth in the Lord. When I asked her if she’s had the chance to really grieve it, she said she said. She said many many tears were shed over the experience. ...

... And Ashton's meltdown began. We were frosting cookies for the nightshift at the police station tonight. We were doing this as a thank you for all their amazing work keeping us safe.(Which means a lot in our town.)  Ashton had used his knife once as a sword. I gave him a warning "It will be taken away if you use it as a sword again." 5 seconds later out came to sword and I became the bad guy. Working with kids was never something I’ve been drawn toward. I had some horrible babysitting experiences as a kid that traumatized me. Kids were always the aliens I never wanted to deal with after that. But this job has thrust me into that arena, as I’m over all the education of the church from nursery to adults. More than once I’ve doubted my skill, but I never doubt what God is doing. I try my best to just step back and let he Holy Spirit do his thing, because the good Lord knows I don’t have a clue what to do with kids. But tonight have a 7-yr. old boy’...

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I have to love others who have a history of not loving me. I have to love others who've rejected me. One of the first things a professor said to me that hit me really, really hard was this: "You can't be in ministry unless you love people." and then one step further... "If you don't think people can change, just leave right now". This seems like it should've been a "duh" kind of thing, but for me, it wasn't. When I first felt God calling me to the kind of ministry I am training and studying to be, I just didn't know about the "hugeness" of it all. I honestly hadn't processed everything that ministry meant. I had (to an extent) - in fact, read  this post  to see what I mean by that. God made some big changes in my during 2010. A lot of it was through  this . Best. Study. Ever. A lot of it was simply the transition time of my life; after several years in one town moving out of state and attending seminary. God d...

So, I'm about 5 months into my new job. And Wednesday night I was overwhelmed by it. Not so much in the details of the job - i.e., the stuff that needs to get done to make a ministry even happen. I've pretty much got that down now. But I was overwhelmed in the "people side" of all. I had a lot thrown at me last night from different people and I realized something that's been happened to me since I got here - but it was happening in pieces and I didn't put them all together until this morning, as I was talking with the senior pastor. What's happening... is that everyone is trying to get me on "their" side. Doesn't seem like such a bad thing. But over and over again as people come to me with ideas and stories and thoughts and feelings, I've realized a couple of very important things: the person who did this job before me made a lot of enemies. And that's not me; it's just not in my nature. So it's almost as if they are reac...

It's quite cold here in the central part of the state. The wind is biting and chilling us to the bones. I've finally dug out my winter coat and searched in vain for my hat this morning. It's just as well... my hair looked too good to cover up anyway. Hee. It's now the first day of December and we still haven't had snow. This time of the year usually offers a different kind of reflection for me. Part of it's the season of Christmas, and another is the wintery weather. But the biggest part of it, I think, is the busyness. We equate this time of year with rushing... through stores, to work, back home, at rehearsals, to church, to get-togethers and parties, to bible study... It is a busy time of year - but why is it busy? The most obvious answer is because we make it that way. Our choice lead to busyness. But for me, it's more than that. My reason for busyness is a little bit of a paradox. The most hectic part of my life this Christmas season is my work at t...

What I'm listening to: My Restoration mix Five Qualities of an Effective Worship Leader (by Lamar Boschman) 1.) Knowledge of God (Have a large view of God) 2.) A Heart Shaped by Worship (Be a worshiper in private) 3.) Intuitiveness (Sensitivity to the Holy Spirit is essential) 4.) Pastoral Heart (Be a leader of people before you are a leader of songs) 5.) Musicality (Play skillfully before the Lord) As a worship leader, I've always felt more like the quarterback than the coach. Meaning I'm in there, with the congregation -worshipping - just as the quarterback is in there with the team. A leader, but in no way like the coach, who is just shouting instruction from the sidelines. I'm leading them, but we are working together to get down the field to the goal - authentic worship of God. I struggle with accepting that's really all I can do. Our worship band is comprised of an amazing group of worshippers. They love playing music and much as I do, but abo...